let your gentlessness be known, even to your children

True confessional: I have been the tiger mother. I have no time for unkindness from one child to the next.

So you’d think I was an excellent example of gentleness.

This is the hardest thing I am learning in my first four years of this homeschool lifestyle…


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A Charlotte Mason advocate, Catherine Levinson, pushed home this very point at the most recent homeschool conference I attended. My ears perked; in fact, I was all ears. My heart wanted to take a brisk walk out the back door, cause I knew the next ten minutes were going to propel me into the shame and guilt stratosphere.

Catherine Levinson also added: “They’ll remember the emotion, but they won’t remember why“. Aiy. Great…guilt-producing, shame-encouraging fodder for thought. They won’t remember why I was mad, ie: cause they were hitting someone, or you fill in the blank. They’ll simply remember my overreaction.

I really didn’t need her to guilt me. I feel guilty every time I know I am being too harsh, forcing home my point, ever-so-ungraciously.

Levinson concluded by admonishing, “discipline without anger. Create an ‘if, then’ chart that encourages non-emotional parenting“. If my child steps over the line when she does…, then I, as a parent, will do this…

Indeed. If I am honest and expect that that moment of frustration in me, when my child is rude to me, or hitting her brother, or you-fill-in-the-blank, occurs…and it always does…then I’ll be quick to default to creative correction rather than undue force.

Just as I strive to teach my children to be gentle and kind-hearted with one another, I, too, will strive to learn my most important lesson in this lifestyle, to be known for gentleness.

Let your gentleness be known to all, mom, even to your children“.

Catherine Levinson

Enjoy the book of homeschool encouragement for you, homeschool mama: Homeschool Mama Self-Care: Nurturing the Nurturer

Homeschool Mama Self-Care: nurturing the nurturer

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You can also take a mini-retreat here: the Homeschool Mama Retreat.