philosophy / what I've learned

if you hear a voice within…

If you hear a voice within you saying,

‘You are not a painter,’ then by all means paint…

and that voice will be silenced.

Vincent Van Gogh

Thank you Van Gogh.

I had heard the same emphasis last weekend at a writer’s conference.

How can I declare that I’m a writer? People want books, published books. And I want to give it to them; but I’ve not done that yet. Though there was that anthology book with a couple entries, and a book forward that mentioned my name for editing, and a dozen magazine articles. At what point will I declare, I am a writer?

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Well, when I write of course. And this I do. And this I’ve done since my first allowance purchase of a square grass green locked journal at the tender age of six.

No, you can’t accuse me of being a wealthy writer…although I’d be glad if you could.

I certainly am paid handsomely in passion, in clarity, in energizing life satisfaction.

As they say, I have found my calling (or at least one of them)…and I can just be thankful that my helpful husband is an encouraging Patron of the Arts.

I didn’t gain this clarity in my life until ten years ago. Oh, I knew I loved writing, but it didn’t dawn on me that I would want to pursue it professionally when I’d headed out of high school.

I’m certain my high school English teacher would laugh hysterically, or at least look cross-eyed, discovering that I aspire to an MFA in my spare time someday.

My awareness of this potential professional passion arrived after two kids were born, another was on the way, and I’d already determined I wanted to be a full-time mother.

A pleasant conversation over tea with Christian historical fiction author, Jeanette Oke, encouraged me immensely that year. I didn’t even start my career till I was forty. You’re never too old to write.

I’m about to approach forty (or at least the calendar says I am), and I’ve at least been thinking about the writing world for ten years.

I won’t whine and complain about time lost in this passion…well, sometimes I will, just not publicly. I can guarantee you though, I will be watching intently to help my kiddos find their purpose or passion in the world.

Perhaps it won’t be college that they’ll need to start their business. Or, maybe they’ll need to jump through high school math or science course hoops; which they might find on-line distance learning, or even at the local high school. Maybe there will be reasons they head to Paris for language training before they begin their career in the CIA. Maybe we’ll prep them for SATs, or focus on a particular university entrance exam. Who knows?!

No matter what the direction or aspiration, we’ll help them find their way and listen to the voice that speaks who they are, so they won’t need to question who they are, or ask the crowd for permission.

One thought on “if you hear a voice within…

  1. RE: In regards to this comment: “I’m about to approach forty (or at least the calendar says I am), and I’ve at least been thinking about the writing world for ten years.” As I was the one who delivered you on November 30, 1973 I can assure you are almost 40. HAPPY 40th Birthday this coming Nov 30. Yes you have always had a desire to be a writer. I cannot wait to read your first “BOOK”. I love you Teresa. MOM

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