you know you’re a homeschooler when…

1. Someone yells, “Dad, Zachary shooted a bullet at my back“!!! And dad responds: “You mean shot…” Half minute later, “Oh, that’s too bad“.

2. You’re sharing your sensory-enhanced sentences with one another in the bathroom while the ‘teacher’ is flat ironing her hair.

3. You purchase chemistry experiment ingredients–that you later eat for dinner (purple cabbage anyone?)

4. The kiddos tell grandpa to “write crap” when you’re stuck for clever story ideas. When he looks at them surprised, they defend themselves with: “Mom said to write crap” (and naturally I defend myself quoting a repeat published author who admonished me to ‘write crap’ to kick start writing).

5. You consult Pinterest for next day’s studies.

6. You’re teaching your five year old to make bread in the kitchen, helping him to knead the sticky dough independently so you can get back to the math students who need help understanding prime factors.

7. You don’t know when Spring Break is scheduled. And you don’t really care, because spring break means the weather is reasonable enough to be outside, so studies are done for the year anyway.

8. When visiting the nearest wall climbing center, your son is asked if he likes to play on the monkey bars at school, and he tells her he doesn’t know what monkey bars are.

9. Your kids are playing chess and drinking hot chocolate at 8:30 pm at the local coffee shop on a school night.

10. Your hubby says to your just five year old after he asks “Dad, what does this say?” (pointing to a book). “Sound it out buddy.“… Mom chimes in: “Honey, he doesn’t read”. Oh…