homeschool mama self-care: dashed expectations

Homeschool mama self-care means you need to attend to your dashed expectations.

No question, parenting wasn’t as I imagined it before I birthed my first child. Neither was homeschooling after my first year.

In both camps, I have had far more frustration and confounding moments than I conceived were possible. And in both camps, I have had far deeper satisfaction and happiness than I imagined could happen daily, all messily mixed into those frustrations.

May 2013 131

Evaluate what I want. For me and for them.

Both parenting and homeschooling have required me to continually evaluate what I want for this part of my life and theirs?

What memories do I hope to create? Since I only have them for a short time, what kind of fun do I want to experience with them?

What daily activities are important for them to learn? Like life habits: brushing their teeth or reading regularly. How much time should we spend in social activities or extracurriculars?

What character traits do I hope to instill? What character traits do I need to quickly learn myself?

How much time do I want to spend scolding or giving consequences and how much time do I want to give grace and forgive their childhood follies?

What do I hope the messages of my life will send (never mind the ones I’m unaware that I’m sending?)

How am I choosing to influence my children?

Whatever things I think I can mold there are so many things about them I can’t mold, like who they were born into the world to be. In fact, the essence of who they were born to be is influencing me, my experience of life, and propels my life into directions unforeseen.

Celebrate the whole thing. The mess, the memories, the moments.

I celebrate the magical unknown, and more importantly, the beauty of the little ones that came from me, but whose person I didn’t have any influence on creating, really.

When we’re looking at our homeschool world from this view, we are attending to our dashed expectations, real homeschool mama self-care.

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