How do you deal with the uncertainty of your homeschool choice so you can homeschool with confidence?
First, let’s just assume that there are occasions when we may feel uncertain.
Being uncertain is a human experience and we will all feel it sometime. So it’s totally normal that you feel this way about your homeschool choice.
Cause your homeschool choice isn’t a full-on mainstream choice, especially after everyone had the opportunity to try their hand at a little home education in the last couple years.
Some discovered, woo hoo! This homeschool thing is awesome. And others discovered there ain’t no way they’re homeschooling. So can you homeschool with confidence?
Clearly, you discovered its charms. (& I’m so glad you discovered what I discovered, the charms, the freedoms, the beauties of this homeschool lifestyle)…
But clearly, everyone doesn’t agree.
All schools everywhere didn’t transform into homeschools.
And here you are: choosing homeschool.
Then why do you doubt?
Oh, I dunno, there are a few reasons you might have a doubt about your homeschool choice.
As a homeschool mama, it might look like this:
- you’re homeschooling with an unsupportive partner,
- you went to the grocery store during a school day,
- you sat around the Thanksgiving table with an unsupportive family member (or six),
- you wake up in the middle of the night with existential angst: am I making the biggest mistake of my (& our children’s) lives,
- things are not going smoothly on a homeschool morning when no one wants to start a homeschool day, including you…
- or you’re at the library when a librarian doesn’t approve…
- or any time someone asks you with surprise, why isn’t your child in school?
- or any time you hear a neighbour speak about a cool thing their child did at school,
- or any time you wonder how you’re going to get your child through high school,
- or any time you wonder how you’re going to deal with high school math,
- or you fill-in-the-blank (cause I’m sure you have something to add).
Are any of these reasons relatable?
Are we certain of our homeschool choice ALL the time?
- It’s a human thing to not be certain of anything all of the time.
- It’s human to not be confident that you’re making the best choices.
- It’s human to not believe you’re being the best parent (because of course you’re not, your human!)
- It’s human to wonder if you are even equipped to be a parent (even after you had spent years wanting to be a parent).
So we have to learn to be congruent, rendering our doubts, uncertainties, and not-good-enough feelings in our homeschools.
Here are a few things I suggest to render that homeschool doubt and own your homeschool choice with confidence.
1. You are going to have to practice rendering those feelings.
What are the things you’re uncertain about behind closed doors?
You need to acknowledge the reality of those thoughts. Things left unsaid suck more energy than you want to invest. (Kinda like leaving a hundred different tabs open on your computer. Stuff will take longer to process.)
When we acknowledge the thing that we don’t want to say out loud, we dispel a lot of its energy.
So be straight with yourself: what makes you doubt?
2. Practice not caring what other people think.
You’re only listening to what other people think because you care what they think.
And I’m aware how difficult this practice can be when you’re first starting out (been there done that). But you gotta start somewhere.
ps This practice will benefit you in all sorts of ways: it’s called building boundaries.
3. Sometimes we need to do our research: when we’re armed with research, we don’t doubt as much.
That’s why it’s useful to read.
(And if you don’t have time to read, I feel you, you’re a homeschool mama with stuff to do. But if you want to address and dispel some of your doubts, you’ll have to be proactive.)
Might I suggest you begin reading here:
And if you want to supplement your homeschool learning, join the Homeschool Mama Book Club, where I read a lot for you and we discuss useful books that will benefit your homeschool experience.
4. Are you doubting because homeschooling isn’t always charmed?
Right, ok, now we’re tapping into something that touches a nerve.
You want it to be the charmed homeschool life.
I want it to be the charmed homeschool life, for you and for me.
(It’s why you’re reading this on a website called Capturing the Charmed Life).
But it just isn’t always charmed.
Your kids are growing up. You’re still growing up.
Life does its life thing on some days.
You chose to be with your kids a lot.
Some days that feels like the most amazing idea ever. Other days, it feels a little nuts. (You’re both right).
5. Know that parenting perfection isn’t a thing, no matter what choices you make.
We aren’t God.
We were intended to lead, guide and direct, love, nurture, and provide our children.
Thank God we aren’t God!
But perfect parenting isn’t a possibility, because we aren’t perfect.
If none of the things I’ve mentioned above feel like they ring true, then I’ll give you this last tip: sit, pray and/or meditate.
Allow yourself to spend time with your uncomfortable feelings each day.
Sit quietly. Pay attention to your breath.
Do that until it becomes clear. (And make sure to answer in your journal. Putting that stuff down on paper always makes things clearer).
ps if you want someone to bounce ideas around, you can always join me for a coaching session. You can connect with me here. (Your first session fee is waived).
Do what you can with what you know. When you know to do better, do better.Maya Angelou
In the end, these young people have been placed in our world.
Each day we enjoy ordinary and extraordinary days.
So enjoy the journey, enjoy your path, and enjoy your kiddos.
Overcoming Homeschool Overwhelm
…for the homeschool mama who wants to be clear, confident & satisfied…
A self-coaching journaling workbook for the overwhelmed homeschool mama who doesn’t want to be overwhelmed anymore.
Journal questions can aid in your self-exploration, to get curious about what your reasons for overwhelm might be. They can be a self-coaching tool to help you discover the barriers getting in the way of your homeschool life so you can show up on purpose in your homeschool and have homeschool satisfaction.
People also ask…
- How can I Capture the Charmed Homeschool?
- Do you do one-on-one homeschooling coaching? Why, yes I do!
- How can I join the Homeschool Mama Retreat? (& what is this?)