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Meet Taryn, a dedicated homeschool mom who dreamed of providing her four children with the freedom and personalized education that homeschooling promises. Together, we worked on her Homeschool Burnout Prevention Plan.
The reality of endless chores, perpetual meal prep, and a packed schedule of extracurricular activities has left her feeling exhausted, foggy, and overwhelmed. Despite her best efforts, Taryn felt like she was losing sight of herself and the joyful vision she once had for her family.
Feeling unsupported and hesitant to assert her needs, Taryn often found herself at a breaking point, sobbing in the bathroom where she could find a moment of solitude. But all of that began to change when she reached out for help.
In today’s episode, we’ll hear how Taryn worked to renew her sense of purpose and joy in her homeschool mom life: she did this through her homeschool burnout prevention plan.
Taryn discovered practical strategies to manage her household, be realistic and present in her responsibilities, and learn to prioritize her well-being. We’ll explore the questions she needed to answer and the personalized A.C.T.I.O.N. Whether you’re a seasoned homeschool parent or just beginning, Taryn’s story will likely inspire you and offer you valuable insights if you’re overwhelmed by this homeschool lifestyle.
This discussion is for you if you want a Homeschool Burnout Prevention Plan…
- You’re experiencing anxiety, know that you’re feeling foggier than you used to, disinterested or unhappy with life, know that how you show up in activities or relationships has changed a lot, wonder if you’re depressed, had someone ask you if you’re depressed, but don’t know for sure or don’t want to address it because now really isn’t the right time…this episode is for you.
- You don’t feel like doing formal learning activities because you can’t get off the sofa, not because you’ve actively signed up for unschooling…this episode is for you.
- Or you don’t have a supportive partnering relationship, but you are IN a partnering relationship, but doing something about it would feel more challenging than doing nothing…this episode is for you.
I’m going to be your straight-talking friend who will lovingly come alongside you and say, Time’s up, girlfriend, something needs to change.
And if you just want to instill a Burnout Prevention Plan because you’ve heard that homeschooling is a lot of work and you want to know what you’re getting into before you do it, this episode is also for you.
Do any of this sound familiar?
- Want to homeschool for freedom, but it’s not feeling like the freedom you wanted.
- The house mess is making me nuts. It’s never clean. Even when it’s clean, it’s only clean for 5 minutes.
- Feel like I’m making meals all day long and then cleaning up after them the other half the day.
- Too many extracurriculars.
- Don’t feel comfortable disappointing people and you’re very occupied volunteering as well as overseeing homeschool co-op and homeschooling her four kids.
- Leery about asserting herself in case someone else is disappointed or frustrated, yet she finds herself regularly losing her temper with her kids, acting like a drill sergeant in her homeschool army, but really wants to not get up each morning.
- Does your homeschool experience feel like a daily struggle?
- You’re not showing up as you’d like in your homeschool? (And you definitely wouldn’t want someone to be a fly on the wall watching you).
- Do you feel that what you’re doing isn’t good enough (or just OKAY)?
- Are your unrealistic expectations getting in the way of your satisfaction or your relationship with your kids?
- Do you feel like you’re losing yourself to the constant demands and requests and needs of everyone else but yours?
- Or do you feel unsupported in your homeschool choice (or in life in general)?
Dictionary definition of burnout:
A state of physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion caused by prolonged stress, overwork, or excessive responsibilities, often resulting in feelings of cynicism, detachment, and a decreased sense of accomplishment. Burnout can affect various aspects of one’s life, including work, relationships, and personal fulfillment, and may lead to decreased motivation, impaired performance, and a decline in overall well-being.
The Homeschool Mom Burnout Chronicles: Taryn’s Journey
Dream of Freedom: Chapter 1
Taryn sat at the kitchen table, a lukewarm cup of coffee in front of her. She stared at the curriculum plans spread out across the table, feeling an overwhelming sense of dread. Homeschooling had always been her dream. The idea of giving her four kids the freedom to learn at their own pace and follow their interests was something she had always cherished. Yet, the reality was far more absorbing than she had ever anticipated.
Never-Ending Mess: Chapter 2
The house was in constant chaos. No matter how much she cleaned, it was only a matter of minutes before toys were strewn across the living room and dishes piled up in the sink. Taryn felt like she was living in a perpetual cycle of cleaning and re-cleaning. The mess was driving her nuts, making her feel like she was failing as both a mother and a homemaker. Each day felt foggy, and she struggled to find joy in the little things that used to make her smile.
Kitchen Trap: Chapter 3
Her day revolved around meals. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, and the countless snacks in between. She spent half her day preparing food and the other half cleaning up the aftermath. The kitchen was her trap, and there was no escaping it. She felt like she was in a never-ending episode of “Chopped,” with her children as the merciless judges.
Extracurricular Overload: Chapter 4
In an attempt to provide a well-rounded education, Taryn had signed her kids up for a multitude of extracurricular activities. Soccer, piano lessons, art classes, and more. Every evening and weekend was booked solid. She was constantly shuttling her kids from one activity to another, leaving no time for herself.
Fear of Disappointment: Chapter 5
Taryn had a hard time saying no. She didn’t want to disappoint anyone. This led her to volunteer for everything. She oversaw the homeschool co-op, organized community events, and even helped other moms with their homeschooling challenges. Her schedule was overflowing, and she was spreading herself too thin. The fear of letting someone down kept her from asserting herself, and it was taking a toll on her mental health. She felt disinterested in life, going through the motions without any real passion or excitement.
Drill Sergeant: Chapter 6
Despite her best intentions, Taryn often lost her temper with her kids. She had become a drill sergeant, barking orders and demanding discipline. The joy of learning had been replaced by a rigid routine that left little room for spontaneity or fun. Taryn knew this wasn’t the kind of homeschool environment she had envisioned, but she felt trapped by her expectations and the demands of others. She didn’t feel supported by her partner, who seemed oblivious to her struggles. But opening that can of worms felt too daunting, so she kept her feelings bottled up.
The Breaking Point: Chapter 7
One morning, Taryn couldn’t bring herself to get out of bed. The weight of her responsibilities felt like a crushing burden. She lay there, staring at the ceiling, feeling utterly defeated and knew something had to change, but she didn’t know where to start. She needed help, but asking for it felt like admitting failure. Later that day, she found herself sobbing in the bathroom, the only place where she could find a moment of solitude to let her emotions flow freely.
Turning Point: Chapter 8
After much contemplation, Taryn decided to reach out to her community. She confided in a close friend about her struggles, and to her surprise, the response was overwhelmingly supportive. Other moms admitted they felt the same way, and they rallied around her. They offered to share the load, taking on some of the extracurricular driving and volunteering to help with the co-op.
Asserting Herself: Chapter 9
With her friends’ encouragement, Taryn began to set boundaries. She learned to say no and prioritized her family’s needs over the fear of disappointing others. It wasn’t easy, but it was necessary. She streamlined her homeschooling approach, focusing on core subjects and allowing more free play and exploration. She also had a candid conversation with her partner, expressing her need for more support at home.
Reclaiming Satisfaction: Chapter 10
Gradually, the atmosphere in Taryn’s home began to change. The mess didn’t disappear, but it became more manageable. She started meal planning to reduce the time spent in the kitchen. The kids became more independent in their learning, and the drill sergeant was replaced by a more patient and understanding mother. Taryn found joy in homeschooling again, and she no longer dreaded getting up each morning. With her partner now more engaged and supportive, the weight on her shoulders began to lighten.
Epilogue: A New Beginning
Taryn still faced challenges, but she no longer felt alone. She had learned the importance of self-care and community support. Homeschooling was still her passion, but now it was balanced with the needs of her own well-being. She had reclaimed her life, one small step at a time, and she was finally free to enjoy the journey she had always dreamed of. And on those rare days when she found herself crying in the bathroom, she knew she had a network of friends and a loving partner to help her through.
If you want to move from overwhelmed (& someday burnout) to greater clarity, confidence, and satisfaction, you need to create a Homeschool Burnout Prevention Plan.
Building a Burnout Prevention Plan will mean you’re learning to address your needs, nurture & clarify your relationships, and renew your homeschool vision.
Questions to Help Taryn Gain Clarity
1. Daily Routine and Responsibilities:
- What does a typical day look like for you from morning to night?
- How do you feel at the end of each day?
2. Homeschooling Goals and Priorities:
- What are your main goals for homeschooling your children?
- Which aspects of homeschooling do you and your children enjoy the most?
- Are there parts of your formal lessons that feel particularly overwhelming?
3. Household Management:
- How do you currently manage household chores and meal preparation?
- What specific tasks make you feel the most stressed or overwhelmed?
4. Support System:
- Who currently helps you with homeschool and household duties?
- How do you feel about the level of support you receive from your partner and family?
- Have you discussed your needs and challenges with your partner?
5. Time Management and Extracurricular Activities:
- How many extracurricular activities are your children involved in?
- How do you feel about the time commitment required for these activities?
- Are there any activities that could be reduced or eliminated to ease your schedule?
6. Volunteering and Community Involvement:
- What volunteer roles and community responsibilities are you currently managing?
- How do you feel about these commitments?
- Are there any roles you could step back from to create more personal time?
7. Self-Care and Personal Well-being:
- How much time do you have for yourself each day?
- What activities help you relax and recharge?
- Are there any hobbies or interests you’ve neglected due to your busy schedule?
8. Emotional and Mental Health:
- How often do you feel overwhelmed or stressed?
- What triggers your feelings of frustration or anger towards your children?
- Have you noticed any patterns or specific times when you feel the most emotional strain?
9. Boundaries and Assertiveness:
- How comfortable are you with saying no to additional responsibilities?
- Are there specific areas where you feel you need to set clearer boundaries?
- What are your fears about asserting yourself and disappointing others?
10. Long-Term Vision and Adjustments:
- What would your ideal homeschooling and household scenario look like?
- What changes would make the biggest difference in your daily life?
- How do you envision balancing your family’s needs with your well-being in the future?
These questions help Taryn reflect on her current situation, identify areas of stress and overwhelm, and clarify her priorities and needs for creating a more present and satisfying life.
Let’s Create a Homeschool Burnout Prevention Plan…
1. Clarify what matters.
Time audit & create a time block daily routine.
- What matters to you?
- Tell me about your personal values. Tell me about your educational values. Tell me how you want to experience your homeschool family life.
- What is your personal vision?
- Have you developed vision words for your relationship with yourself, your relationship with your partner, have you developed vision words for your relationships with your significant friends/connections?
- And have you developed vision words for your relationship with your Creator?
- And of course, have you developed vision words for your homeschool?
- How much time do you want to create for your interests, you and your partner time, volunteer time, work development, homeschool time, play time, work time.
- Be very specific, like “make a hot breakfast, teach the kids to open the cereal box, pour milk, or just write “eat breakfast”. Include things like “lesson time” every day after breakfast. Or do a readaloud together after lunchtime. Or if none of these apply to YOUR goals, don’t write them because I wrote them as ideas here. Just include the most important elements you want to include.
- Do you really want to continue homeschooling or have you completed that journey? Do you still want to do what you’re doing? You don’t have to. You get to decide what you want in your life.
2. Journal your present thoughts & concerns:
- What’s NOT working for you?
- What’s not working in your life right now?
- And what’s not working for your kids?
- Assess each of your activities: do you have to be doing this?
- What is the reason you have to be doing this?
- If you’re presently feeling burned out, grab your journal, write your list of activities that you think are contributing to your burnout; then create a pie chart.
- Ask yourself what an ideal homeschool day would look like to you?
- Describe how you’d like to show up in your homeschool family?
- Ask yourself how you want to feel at the end of your homeschool days and if you see that you’re on the trajectory to achieving that.
3. Tell me why you homeschool…
- What brought you to homeschooling?
- Write the reasons you still want to homeschool.
- What do you look forward to as you homeschool?
- What challenges have especially tapped you?
- If you’ve been homeschooling for a while, consider the seasonal shifts you’ve experienced in your homeschool life: how have you actually done it practically and how are you feeling about it presently?
- How has your vision about homeschooling changed over time?
- Is how you’re showing up each day consistent with your vision?
- Do the activities you’re engaging in align with your vision?
The reasons that bring you to this homeschool lifestyle are possibly not the same reason you continue to homeschool. Know your why so that you can know your HOW. Why you homeschool should influence HOW you homeschool.
4. Know what you believe about an education.
- Explore what you believe an education is and how you engage in learning activities: do they align?
- Know how you default to learning.
- Understand (& observe) how your kids default in learning.
- Get clear on your early scripts about what an education is and how it works.
- Read from a Homeschool Reading List for a More Confident and Intentional Life.
5. Create a Wellness Routine.
- Grab the Wellness Journal for Homeschool Moms.
- Create a morning routine.
- Create an Away Time Routine.
- Leave for an hour a week. If you could do something each week, what would you do? Find an interest you enjoy outside mothering or homeschooling.
- Share our kids with someone else.
- Book an extracurricular when you can leave them and go do something: errands for 20, YOU for 40.
- Exercise. To burn off tension. Get your Homeschool Mom Home Exercise playlist on my YouTube channel.
- If you’re underslept, require your partner to participate, book a hotel stay just for you, send them to your mother’s, don’t co-sleep, don’t breastfeed.
- Build self-awareness practices into your routine: mirroring, journaling, breathing, affirmations, and coaching.
6. Incorporate self-compassion strategies.
Learn to assess your thoughts:
- Journaling
- Affirmations
- Mirroring techniques
- Mindful moments
- Don’t pray if it makes you anxious. Just BE with your Creator.
- Meditation
- Yoga & body scans
- Breathwork
- Join me for a coaching consult and we can create an A.C.T.I.O.N. Plan.
7. Clarify your relationship challenges, needs, and intentions.
- Understand how (& why) you interact with your kids as you do.
- Have conversations with your partner, and if you can’t, ask yourself why and what you’re going to do about it.
- Learn a little about Enneagram.
8. Grow Yourself Up: determine your present growth plan.
We’re all on a growth trajectory: welcome to being on the earth.
- When you agree that everything is working for you, even the hard stuff, accept where you’re at and determine to grow.
- Determine not to resist, but accept: suffering is found in non-acceptance.
- Yet always be proactive.
9. Are there reasons you’re tapped that have nothing to do with homeschooling…
- A relationship challenge with your partner, your parents, or a good friend.
- Chronic health issue or helping someone with a chronic health issue.
- Worries over lack of finances.
- A particular relationship challenge with a child?
- Grieving over loss of professional identity, but still homeschooling.
- A grief or loss in the family.
- A particular health concern or condition of a child.
- Are you challenged with a mental health issue or addiction but haven’t addressed it yet.
We work together to make that happen. I am her gentle accountability partner, her cheerleader, her clarifier, and also her challenger. She puts the strategies into place, experiments with them, learns why they sometimes don’t, then tries again–then she connects with me via email through the week, and joins me for another coaching conversation.
The Homeschool Burnout Prevention Plan in A.C.T.I.O.N.
Assessment (A):
- Identify Challenges:
- Help Taryn pinpoint specific areas causing stress, such as household management, meal preparation, homeschooling routines, and extracurricular activities.
- Assess her emotional and mental health, including feelings of overwhelm, disinterest, and lack of support from her partner.
- Evaluate Strengths:
- Highlight her dedication to her children’s education and her commitment to providing a nurturing home environment.
- Acknowledge her organizational skills and ability to manage multiple responsibilities despite the challenges.
Clarity (C):
- Define Desired Outcomes:
- Assist Taryn in visualizing her ideal homeschooling and household scenario, including a balanced routine that allows for self-care and personal well-being.
- Clarify her goals for reducing stress, increasing support, and creating a more joyful and fulfilling homeschooling experience.
- Set Clear Objectives:
- Establish specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART) goals for her action plan.
Tools and Resources (T):
- Identify Support Systems:
- Help Taryn recognize and utilize her existing support network, including friends, family, and community resources.
- Explore options for additional support, such as hiring help for household chores or meal prep, or finding local homeschooling groups.
- Provide Practical Tools:
- Suggest tools for better time management and organization, such as planners, meal planning apps, and chore charts.
- Recommend resources for homeschooling that can make lessons more engaging and less time-consuming.
Implementation (I):
- Develop a Step-by-Step Plan:
- Create a detailed action plan with specific steps for each goal, such as setting boundaries, delegating tasks, and prioritizing self-care.
- Break down larger tasks into manageable actions to prevent overwhelm.
- Establish Routines:
- Work with Taryn to develop daily and weekly routines that balance homeschooling, household responsibilities, and personal time.
Ongoing Accountability (O):
- Monitor Progress:
- Schedule regular check-ins to review Taryn’s progress towards her goals, offering feedback and encouragement.
- Track milestones and celebrate small victories to keep her motivated.
- Adjust as Needed:
- Be flexible and willing to adjust the action plan based on what’s working and what’s not.
- Help Taryn identify any new challenges and brainstorm solutions.
Optimization (O):
- Refine Strategies:
- Continuously assess the effectiveness of implemented strategies and make necessary refinements.
- Encourage Taryn to leverage her strengths and address any persistent obstacles.
- Leverage Strengths:
- Highlight Taryn’s successes and build on them to create more positive changes.
- Encourage her to focus on areas where she feels confident and capable.
Nurturing (N):
- Provide Ongoing Support:
- Offer continuous encouragement and reassurance to help Taryn stay committed to her action plan.
- Be a source of emotional support, helping her navigate difficult moments and avoid burnout.
- Encourage Self-Care:
- Emphasize the importance of self-care and ensure Taryn makes time for activities that rejuvenate her.
- Help her find ways to integrate relaxation and self-care into her daily routine.
By following this Homeschool Burnout Prevention Plan, Taryn can implement positive changes in her life, achieve her goals, and create a more present, fulfilling homeschool experience.
Book a conversation with Teresa to create your Homeschool Burnout Prevention Plan.
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Teresa Wiedrick
I help overwhelmed homeschool mamas shed what’s not working in their homeschool & life, so they can show up authentically, purposefully, and confidently in their homeschool & life.