How to Homeschool and Not Lose Yourself: A Path Back to Wholeness with FLOW
This is a story on how to homeschool and no lose yourself in the process.
I was sitting poolside in Baja, celebrating my mom’s 71st birthday, when I struck up a conversation with a woman who had just moved across the country—from California to South Carolina.
She had been through a divorce, raised kids, co-parented, and later remarried. Her life had gone through many chapters—and now, it was full of beauty and stability. But as we talked, she said something I’ve heard from many women before:
“I don’t know why I’m always looking for something to be wrong. My life is really, really good.”
Maybe you’ve said something like that too.
You chose this homeschool life. You chose to be with your kids. And you built rhythms, maybe even adventures, and from the outside—it looks like it’s all going well.
But deep inside?
There’s a quiet ache. A kind of disconnect. Something that feels off, or missing, or maybe just unspoken.
That feeling? That’s the early whisper of self-loss. And learning how to homeschool and not lose yourself begins when you finally decide to listen to it.
➡️Take this simple step toward remembering who you really are.
What If You Didn’t Have to Trade Yourself to Raise a Family…
Before I raised a family, I didn’t really know who I was—at least not deeply. Like many women, motherhood was a powerful and beautiful identity shift, but it also blurred the lines around my own sense of self.
We’re people beyond mothers. We have stories, dreams, and needs that existed long before our children arrived—and those parts of us matter.
Uncovering who we truly are, beyond the daily roles and expectations, is essential—not just for our own fulfillment but for the long haul of homeschooling.
When we nurture that separate sense of self, it fuels us. It makes the homeschooling years more joyful. It softens the overwhelm. And it gives us space to be patient and present instead of haggard and irritated.
This is the soul work I’ve done and now share with other homeschool moms. It’s not about a curriculum or a schedule hack. It’s a framework I call FLOW—a way to come home to yourself, especially in seasons where you’ve lived for everyone else but you.
By reclaiming your identity, you don’t just survive homeschooling—you enjoy it more deeply. And as you do, you model for your children what it looks like to be a whole, separate person who also loves and guides them.
It’s a way to come home to yourself.
How to Homeschool and Not Lose Yourself–FLOW: A Path Back to Wholeness
Here’s what FLOW invites us to do:
F — Find Your Voice
The part of you that knows what she needs, what she wants, and what she no longer wants to pretend about.
Britt, a homeschool mom I coached, said:
“I reclaimed my voice and my needs. I began to untangle what I wanted for my kids and what I wanted for myself.”
For me, finding my voice wasn’t about reclaiming something I’d lost after motherhood—it was about discovering a sense of self I hadn’t yet fully known before I became a mom. Motherhood brought incredible meaning, yes, but it also revealed how much of my own identity I hadn’t yet uncovered or nurtured. Finding my voice became the daily act of saying yes to me—beyond all the roles I played.
L — Listen Within
The truth isn’t always loud—but it’s always present. We just need to get quiet enough to hear it.
Latoya shared:
“The biggest shift has been learning to allow myself to have, feel, and express all my feelings.”
For me, listening within meant slowing down enough to notice the quiet ache underneath the busy, to honor the parts of me that felt unseen or muted. It was learning to trust those subtle nudges, the feelings I once dismissed as “too much” or inconvenient. Listening inward created space to breathe, to be real, and to reconnect with who I was beneath the mother, the homeschooler, the caretaker.
O — Own Your Story
You don’t have to hide anymore. The whole story gets to come with you—the parts you’re proud of and the parts you used to tuck away.
Latoya also told me:
“We’re not just raising kids—we’re raising whole humans. And if we don’t understand ourselves, our kids risk entering the world doubtful of who they are.”
Owning my story means holding the full complexity of my journey—from confusion about who I was before motherhood, to the messy growth of learning to prioritize my needs alongside my family’s. It means modeling for my children that it’s okay to be unfinished, evolving, and sometimes uncertain—and that our worth isn’t tied only to what we give to others.
W — Walk in Wholeness
You are not broke and you are not just a role. You are whole—and you get to live like it.
Britt reflected:
“It actually took the pressure off homeschooling when I stopped trying to get all my fulfillment from it.”
For me, walking in wholeness was the moment I realized I didn’t need to sacrifice me to be a good mom or a committed homeschooler. When I gave myself permission to be whole and complex, my energy shifted—I became more present, less reactive, and found joy in the homeschooling journey instead of pressure or burnout. Wholeness isn’t about perfection; it’s about showing up as all of who you are, unapologetically.
You Can Homeschool and Not Lose Yourself
This is what I guide women through—inside coaching sessions, circles, and now, my upcoming FLOW workshop.
If you’ve ever felt that quiet ache—the “I should feel happy, but something’s missing”—you are not alone. And you don’t have to keep pushing that feeling aside.
You can raise your kids. You can homeschool with intention. And you can still be you.
If something in this post stirred something in you—an ache, a memory, a quiet yes—let’s keep the conversation going. I’ve created the Rediscovering Yourself Journaling Workbook to help you gently explore who you are beneath the roles, the routines, and the homeschool planner.
This isn’t about reinventing yourself overnight. It’s about returning—slowly, lovingly—to the person you’ve always been. ✨ Download the Workbook here
This isn’t about reinventing yourself overnight. It’s about returning—slowly, lovingly—to the person you’ve always been.
NURTURING YOU: A Digital Workbook for Homeschool Moms | Instant Download
Rediscover yourself beyond homeschooling with this 14-page guide. Packed with exercises for creativity, self-awareness, and personal growth — perfect for busy moms looking for balance and “me time.”
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I help homeschool mamas shed what’s not working in their homeschool & life, so they can show up authentically, purposefully, and confidently in their homeschool & life.
